The past life regression was awesome. I have never felt so utterly safe in a room with another person before — I had tears flowing down my throat, snot streaming down my face, and I was strangely okay with it, because I knew that if I moved, I’d pull myself out of the moment.It was like remembering something that happened last week or last year — clear, visual, emotionally charged — but the story was about a woman at the turn of the last century. I watched her life in a series of scenes, out of order, from about the age of 8 until the moment of her death in her late 60s — she was from a fairly wealthy family in upstate New York, had rather stiff, emotionally stunted parents and an indulged younger brother, tried to escape a society marriage by going west to somewhere like Iowa to live with an aunt, taught in a one-room schoolhouse, was set up to marry a local guy she detested (who decided to take her down a peg by pulling stunts like capsizing the boat they were in to get her dress muddy, etc).She was going to escape by going to France with her brother, but when her brother came to collect her, he was killed en route. Feeling trapped, she married the jerk, had a daughter with him (named her Sophia, and felt that naming her daughter after the goddess of wisdom was a rather cruel joke, because the future she saw for her was as bleak as her own), and put her life on hold until he finally died, sometime in her 40s. At that point, she was able to access her inheritances from her father and brother, and started a scholarship fund for intellectual and artistic young women. She died in the solarium in her daughter’s home (her daughter grew up well adjusted, became a dancer, and had a happy marriage).The regression was powerful, because while it didn’t resolve what I was hoping for it to resolve in exactly the way I expected, it let go of a lot of other extraneous stuff. I stopped apologizing for any aspect of who I am, which is a big part of why the blogs started when they did, and I started reclaiming a lot of emotional territory, a lot of strength, that I’ve surrendered over the years. I want to go back, though I’m not sure what I’d go for this time. I feel so relieved of so much old, stagnant stuff. If you’re interested in trying it, Eric Christopher is the guy to see. Really lovely, gentle guy.
Thank you, Eric, for guiding me into a more authentic relationship with myself, and through it, with the amazing individuals around me.