Past life regression was something I had toyed with doing for a long time. I thought that if anything would help me shift the patterns of my relationships, this was the thing to do it. Willpower and rational analysis weren’t enough, but I was tired of feeling like a slave to my emotional attachments. I came across Eric Christophers’s website the first time I seriously looked into it, nearly scheduled an appointment, and then talked myself out of it. I more or less put it out of mind until a friend asked if I’d ever considered it, and mentioned that she knew of a fantastic guy, the very same Eric Christopher. I scheduled an appointment for the following week. I wrote this this in a letter to a friend about a week after:
The past life regression was awesome. I have never felt so utterly safe in a room with another person before — I had tears flowing down my throat, snot streaming down my face, and I was strangely okay with it, because I knew that if I moved, I’d pull myself out of the moment.It was like remembering something that happened last week or last year — clear, visual, emotionally charged — but the story was about a woman at the turn of the last century. I watched her life in a series of scenes, out of order, from about the age of 8 until the moment of her death in her late 60s — she was from a fairly wealthy family in upstate New York, had rather stiff, emotionally stunted parents and an indulged younger brother, tried to escape a society marriage by going west to somewhere like Iowa to live with an aunt, taught in a one-room schoolhouse, was set up to marry a local guy she detested (who decided to take her down a peg by pulling stunts like capsizing the boat they were in to get her dress muddy, etc).She was going to escape by going to France with her brother, but when her brother came to collect her, he was killed en route. Feeling trapped, she married the jerk, had a daughter with him (named her Sophia, and felt that naming her daughter after the goddess of wisdom was a rather cruel joke, because the future she saw for her was as bleak as her own), and put her life on hold until he finally died, sometime in her 40s. At that point, she was able to access her inheritances from her father and brother, and started a scholarship fund for intellectual and artistic young women. She died in the solarium in her daughter’s home (her daughter grew up well adjusted, became a dancer, and had a happy marriage).The regression was powerful, because while it didn’t resolve what I was hoping for it to resolve in exactly the way I expected, it let go of a lot of other extraneous stuff. I stopped apologizing for any aspect of who I am, which is a big part of why the blogs started when they did, and I started reclaiming a lot of emotional territory, a lot of strength, that I’ve surrendered over the years. I want to go back, though I’m not sure what I’d go for this time. I feel so relieved of so much old, stagnant stuff. If you’re interested in trying it, Eric Christopher is the guy to see. Really lovely, gentle guy.
I found it tremendously liberating to work through a range of powerful emotions that felt relevant to me, but which I was also aware of not being personal, at least in the context of my life as I experience it on a daily basis.
In the three months that have passed since my session, I’ve noticed the continuation of my paradigm shift throughout my life. I feel more justified in thinking of myself as creative, in believing in my own capabilities, in pursuing the connections and experiences I want. I feel more excited about supporting the creative paths of the amazing, talented people around me. I feel more observant of the moments in which I surrender or support my sense of sovereignty, and feel better equipped to take charge of my life and to put it back on track when it gets derailed (with much less self-pity and drama than my old self would have indulged in). I feel more open to asking for help and support when I need it, rather than running away or in overburdening myself with misplaced responsibility. I feel more trusting of how I perceive my relationships, because I feel less inclined to read into them my unmet desires or my fears.
I started this blog within days of my session, having previously made excuses to myself about why I wasn’t qualified or how maintaining it would be too time-consuming, or seeing a practitioner every month would be cost-prohibitive and a tremendous effort. As it has come to pass, I find myself overwhelmed with possibilities of new things to try, new paradigms to explore. I have become much more observant of the events happening around me, and much more open to making the small effort it takes to attend.
Thank you, Eric, for guiding me into a more authentic relationship with myself, and through it, with the amazing individuals around me.
